Please feel free to adapt this template, and all others in these notes, to suit your circumstances.

CELEBRATION OF THE ELDERS

It’s always appropriate to celebrate and honor the leader of a parent group, whenever a new offspring group branches off, even if this is the tenth or fifteenth offspring. But the first is special, a life changing event in which the elder gains a whole new role – that of elder consultant to an autonomous offspring – and a whole new level of status and respect in the larger community. Later branchings add, but do not change. We believe this important life passage deserves to be ritually marked and celebrated.

Celebration for a new Grandparent

To prepare for this ritual, the leaders of the parent and offspring groups should think about their mutual expectations and obligations. We strongly suggest that they compare notes, and work out any disharmonies in advance of the actual branching-off, let alone of the rite. They may want to bring written copies of these statements, in nicely typeset or calligraphed versions if at all possible.
 
  • Invite all the members of your tradition or lineage who are significant to the new Grandparent, certainly including their own direct elders and, if possible, their elders’ elders as far back as you can go. Try to contact the old members of their own parent group, the people with whom they trained. Also invite anybody within your lineage or tradition with whom the new Grandparent is particularly friendly.

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  • Consider decorating a chair or special cushion for the ‘guest of honour,’ or two seats if the parent group is led by a couple.
    • Choice point: either the new Grandparent’s teacher or the student who is now branching might create sacred space or open the ritual according to their own customs. These are two different ritual statements, so consider which is best for you. In either case, invoke the primary Deities of all three generations. These may or may not be the same, depending on your customs.
  • Invite the new Grandparent’s elders, direct and indirect, as many as are present, to give advice on the new role being assumed and blessings to both parent and offspring.

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  • Invite the leader of the first offspring group and the new Grandparent to read and exchange their understandings about their transformed relationship.
    • Option: you may want to consider creating a token of Grandparent status. In ordinary “marriage and birth” type families, this is often a charm bracelet. How it works is that the great-grandparent presents the new grandparent with a bracelet, then the adult and married children present a charm for each new grandchild. You can do something parallel, such that the elder’s gift unifies the diverse gifts of the juniors, to symbolise that this is a branch point, connected at both ends to the original lineage.
  • If there is a physical token of any kind, ask the new Grandparent’s teachers to bless and consecrate it in their own manner and to lead the group in empowering it.

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  • Ritual blessing and sharing of food and drink together.

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  • Lots of conversation: embarrassing reminiscences about their actions, pedantic advice and other expressions of love.

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  • Whoever opened the ritual should close it in their usual way.


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    The address of this page is http://www.proteuscoven.org/proteus/endings/elderbless.htm
    Last modified February 7, 2002